A Tasty Friend

Teacher: What did you do this weekend?
4-year-old: I went to a birthday party.
Teacher: A friend's birthday party?
4-year-old: Yeah.
Teacher: What is your friend's name?
4-year-old: A birthday cake!

"Jesus, Lady"

7-year-old-girl: How old are you?
Me: I'm 25.
7-year-old-girl: Jesus, lady, you better get married!

I want to be a Princess

4-year-old-girl: I want to grow up to be a princess!
Me: I don't know if we have princesses here in America. You could be the president.
Girl: No, we have princesses.
Me: We do?
Girl: Yeah.
Me: Do we have a princess who rules our country?
Girl: No, princesses don't rule.
Me: What do they do then?
Girl: They yell at their mom.
Me: Is that all they do? Yell at their moms?
Girl: You're wearing the same clothes you wore yesterday.
Me: **shame**